GURU

a poetry collection by myself, SumathyRamesh, Sydney, to the tunes of the ragamaligai, aadu mayile nitham aadumayile, a lullaby our aunt Srimathi Jayalakshmi Balasubramanyam sang to as in our formative years in Palani. I have attempted to write the poems as a barathanatyam- mini margam format suitable for a ~15 minute rendition.

குரு

எம் இளவயதில், பழனியில் எம் அத்தை ஸ்ரீமதி ஜெயலட்சுமி பாலசுப்ரமணியம் எம்மை தாலாட்ட பாடிய ஆடு மயிலே நித்தம் ஆடு மயிலே என்ற பாடலின் இசை அமைப்பை ஒட்டி இயற்றிய கவிதை தொகுப்பு; ~15 நிமிடங்களில் ஆடவல்ல மினி மார்க்கமாக அமைக்க முயன்றுள்ளேன்.

CONTEXT

Early in April 2023, myself and my husband visited the Sri Venkateswara Temple at the outskirts of Sydney. There are several shrines and several more beautiful idols installed along the walls of the shrines as integral reliefs. While all of them are dear to me, I have sought respite in the Dhakshinamurthy embellinshing the southern wall of the Chandramuliswarar shrine more than most others in times of adversity over two or three decades. The personification of guru has been very beautifully sculpted in the Dhaksinamurthy idol- the tilt of the chin towards his heart adding a tinge of restraint in his jawline as if to pull his indulgent smile reassuring his confidence in me from turning into a self indulgent smirk telling me I am on my own- the perfect guru. (As I posted in fb on 5 APR 2023), the Temple was preparing for Maha Kumbabishegam, a consecration following significant works, repairs, enhancements, new additions and so on.. not unlike a relaunch of an old classic. As you can imagine the work had been going on for over an year, transparently as devotees continued to use the temple throughout the preparation as we did ourselves. After the deeparadanai of Chandramouleeswarar, Tripurasundari and Subramanyar, myself and my husband pradakshinamed the shrines making our our way to the navagraha, with the intent to stop briefly, as we always did, at the relief housing Dakshinamurthy. Even my husband didn’t know until that day I had this guru-sishya relationship with that idol-nor would he or any one for that matter would have ever imagined my millisecond outpouring to Dakshinamurthy’s reassurance of my capacity to find my feet was even possible.

That day we found the relief was empty.

My heart(the real one) was stunned, sending the clinical one to shudder. I didn't know I loved my Guru so much, I had to loose him before such realisation. I didn't know what to do, or whom to ask, a million thoughts of desperation flooded my being of the things that are mine, that were deliberately taken away from me(because, you can't derive solution design patterns from inadvertent events which are by definition, inadvertent and not by deliberate design). Finding my voice and vision to spot one of the priests, I asked what happened to Dakshinamoorthy. He answered that as part of the work leading upto the Kumbabishegam, they have removed the idol to change the base with granite as they are with the navagraham. Finding my feet to get to my husband who was half way through the pradakshinam of the navagraham, trying to channel whatever my stunned heart rejected, processing it through what changing the base meant and how it would look. Last Saturday while at the temple, we had saw the beautiful granite bases for Dakshinamoorthy and the navagraham, the Dakshinamoorthy, so it seemed to me, has descended from the walls to the ground. I couldn't, ofcourse help teasing him, it was a bad choice, because, previously I looked up to him for inspiration, and now when I see him in his new position, I stand a whole head above him !!!

At the fag end of my career after decades of working hard to establish/deliver solutions with in the scope of the very many roles I fulfilled to eliminate risk of human harm to the best of my ability, its difficult to sit back and watch mediocracy reign supreme in the name of innovation or efficiency; in other words, for some one with my training to look at the root cause of adversity to enable systemic benefit to all users, my need for reassurance from my guru through an indulgent smile every time I sought respite is as real today as it had been before he descended to the ground. I could try doing a namaskaram but I’ll come in the way of others using the praharam….

The mini-margam guru is based on my experience described above.

You may have to get-past my eLobby to read the finished poems. Other material will become available in a day or so.

affectionately,

SumathyRamesh